DeLay: Texans are “Inarticulate and clumsy”

I knew there had to be more to it.

Tom DeLay explained to reporters how he “misspoke” when he revealed to an Assistant DA that he knew the “soft cash for hard cash” money exchange was about to happen, because Jim Ellis told him so, because of “Texas vernacular.”

You know, the Texas vernacular in the sentence answering the question “Did (Ellis) indicate why he was telling you about that?”

To which DeLay replied:

“I think because it was - it's such a large amount of money, he wanted to make sure that - that I knew it was - that it was happening.”

The Texas vernacular in that sentence.

But I have to say, that’s how we all talk in California, too. I don’t see a single “he’s all hat and no cattle” in that. There’s no “he’s fixin’ ta gittaholdayew” or anything even remotely like that.

In this article, Tom further explains what he means by “Texas vernacular:” “Inarticulate and clumsy.”

Is he kidding?

Did Tom DeLay just label the 20 million people in his home state of Texas as “inarticulate and clumsy?” That it’s not just him that is inarticulate and clumsy, but everyone else in his state as well.

This is wrong on just so many levels, but the level that I’d like to address here is to defend “the Texas vernacular” as anything else than inarticulate and clumsy. As a foreigner to these parts, I am often amused by the clever turn of a phrase that arises from the Texas vernacular. Phrases that say so much more than the words do.

Like these time-honored Texas sayings:

"Never ask a man if he's from Texas. If he is, he'll tell you on his own. If he ain't, no need to embarrass him."

"Evil thoughts are like chickens--they come home to roost."

"You can always tell a Texan, but you can't tell him much."

"Tend to your own rat killin'."

"That’s good enough to make a rabbit spit in a bulldog's face."

"If you've done it, it ain't braggin'."

"That's tellin' him how the cow ate the cabbage."

So having now disparaged every man, woman and child in Texas as being inarticulate and clumsy on top of everything else Tom DeLay has done to CD-22, Texas, and America, when Tom DeLay receives his life sentence for his crimes I’m going to be as happy as a gopher in soft dirt.