Oh what a great day to be a Republican in America. Today every single solitary Republican in the US House of Representatives voted to take the food out of the mouths of 4 million children and seniors by voting to drastically cut the federal food stamp program, SNAP. It will now be harder for some of the poor among us to get a meal.
But they weren't done. This do-nothing congress has reformed itself and moved on to more pressing issues.
Like getting rid of the health insurance of 30 million Americans.
Well, to be honest, this is the 42nd time they voted to repeal Obamacare, but this time they did it with the authority that should fill each and every American with awe...and pride.
They linked defunding of Obamacare to a shutdown of the federal government.
You want Obamacare? Gimme your social security check.
You want Obamacare? Good luck seeing a doctor with your Medicare account.
And the best thing? They are asking for your contributions to continue this work. It's true. Reince Priebus sent me an email announcing these good works with a big green "CONTRIBUTE" link at the bottom of it so I can throw them my hard-earned money so they can continue these works that Jesus Christ, the Savior of the World would most certainly approve.