Taking a Poke at Poker in Texas

I have never been able to fathom the rules of the famous variant of the game of poker, Texas Hold ‘Em and will never play the game, but I find it comforting that, should the proposed Texas Poker Gaming Act of 2013 pass in the 83^rd legislative session of the Texas Legislature, scheduled to launch at noon on Tuesday, poker will be legal, and taxed in the state of Texas.

 

Taxed to the tune of 18% of the profits.

Texas is one of just a few places on Earth that actually has a poker game named after it, so it is appropriate that it be legal to play in its namesake state. But I fear that the proposed bill, sponsored by State Rep Eddie Rodriguez (D-Austin), is probably doomed to failure.

The bible pounders and Louisiana gaming interests will probably hire Ralph Reed again to lobby against the bill. Reed and his good friend Jack Abramoff did such a fantastic job in the past.

And then there’s the fact that the state’s18% take on the profits are earmarked, in the bill to benefit homeless and low-income residents of the state.

I mean…really…what Republican would be in favor of that when it could go toward such a worthy cause as Governor Perry’s  Texas Enterprise Fund? Or better yet, to fund a border wall with machine gun turrets every 100 yards?

Or even better, the funds could be used to train and arm every teacher in the state with a semi-automatic handgun equipped with a 30 round magazine.

So this evening I am truly disheartened that it will continue to be illegal to play Texas Hold ‘Em anywhere in the state but the Kickapoo Indian casino at Eagle Pass.