Tuesday, October 23, 2007

The Top Ten Reasons Mikal Watts Dropped Out of the Texas US Senate Race

Everyone is being magnanimous toward Mikal Watts for voluntarily dropping out of the race for US Senate from Texas. There are some out there who are offering up reasons for this startling news so I thought I would encapsulate them in this Lettermanesque top ten list.

Top Ten Reasons Why Mikal Watts Dropped out of the Senate Race

10. He became very upset at everyone always mis-spelling his given name. It’s spelled M-I-C-H-A-E-L.
9. He developed an infected toe and those things hurt if you have to walk all over the state of Texas.
8. He started calling his wife “What's-her-name”.
7. His financial advisor told him that if he had to settle for the Senate salary of $165,200 per year he’d be broke in 3 years.
6. His kids dialed 911 the last time he opened the front door at his own home without knocking.
5. It was the bloggers. The bloggers scared him off.
4. He contracted a really embarrassing STD.
3. It was the bloggers, We just know it was the bloggers.
2. He was recently seen in the company of a woman not his wife and when asked about it said “You mean that she wasn’t my wife? It sure looked like her!”

And the number one reason why Mikal Watts dropped out of the Senate race?

1. Who cares? Mikal Watts did a good thing for himself, his family and for everyone. I hear that he and Rick Noriega are going to work together to see that John Cornyn is not returned to the Senate in 2008.

Vaya con Dios, Mikal Watts.


Anonymous said...

I think the main reason Watts took a dive was that, like the half-finished boat in the basement, his Senate candidacy had "seemed like a good idea at the time." But upon sober reflection he decided that the game wasn't worth the candle.

Short answer, the bloggers, definitely the bloggers scared him off.

Hal said...

Yep, Montag. Agreed.

It was the power of the blogosphere that turned aside a dollar-powered presence. Only the bloggers can accomplish this. It is a new world, don't you know. Can't get anything past the bloggers.

We are the champions,
...of the world.

H-E double hockey sticks, yeah.

boadicea said...

While I'm all about harnessing online power for political change, I think there was a lot more to this than scary bloggers.

Though I've heard Hal can be quite intimidating in his Freddy Krueger mask...

Hal said...

Bwaaha haha!


Anonymous said...

Watts dropped out once it became apparent that Hillary is inevitable because the race is unwinnable with her at the top of the ticket.

Watts is the most successful lawyer of his generation in the whole nation. He's nothing if not smart. He's also pretty wealthy, and most self-made wealthy folks didn't get that way making stupid financial decisions.

Watts is smart enough and financially wise enough to know better than to dump $10 million of his own money into the race with Hillary at the top of the ticket.