Have you seen all of the petitions at Whitehouse.gov
requesting that this or that state be allowed to secede from the union rather
than tolerate 4 more years of a Barack Obama presidency? There’s one from every
southern state and a couple of redneck western states. Oh, and New York.
New York, the state that gave Obama 3,875,876 (and counting)
votes, that’s 62.6% of the vote, and 29 electoral votes.
But oh well, who’s counting.
Not surprisingly, Texas is in and among the crowd with its
own petition, one that Governor Rick Perry, lately of the secessionist movement
of 2011 has disavowed. And therein lies the present story.
Apparently there is a group of Houstonians who have answered
to the Texas petition and have their own petition at Whitehouse.gov beseeching
the federal government to allow the City of Houston to secede from the seceders
and remain a part of the United States of America.
The text is a delight to read.
“We petition the Obama Administration to: Peacefully grant
the city of Houston Texas to withdraw from the state of Texas & remain part
of the United States.”
“We, the city of Houston, think those asking for secession
of the state of Texas are mentally deficient and do not want them representing
us. We would like more education in our state to eradicate their disease. Thank
you. Please help us with these people.”
Imagine the possible outcomes should all of these petitions
be granted. Texas would become a sovereign state, or a state allied with other
states run by delusional people. I even have a name for such an alliance of
states: The Delusional States of America.
But Houston would be an island, a city within another
country much like West Berlin during the bad old days of the Cold War.
Should another hurricane hit the area, Houston would have
FEMA, but the surrounding areas would have to wait for private enterprise to
restore power and infrastructure let alone get food and water to the impacted
areas.
Should Houston become a haven for Texas escapees who tunnel
under the Houston Wall to freedom (or education) they might have to endure an
airlift program from the USA to bring in supplies.
And like the wall that these people want to build along the
Mexican border, the United States will likewise have to build a wall between
them and Delusionals. And not to keep their citizens in, but to keep the
Delusionals out. Such a wall will not necessarily be forbidding in its
structural soundness, but more in the way of a repellant.
I suggest one made of scientific textbooks and watchtowers
blaring hip hop music day and night.
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