Saturday, March 07, 2009

I’ll Say It: Rush Limbaugh for President

Let’s get real. Who is the best fit for the Grand Obstructionist Party in 2012? Who can the Party of NO put up to oppose the juggernaut that is the Obama Administration?

Sarah Palin? Give me a break. Besides being a woman, and no self-respecting white-haired puffy Republican man would ever want a woman for anything other than a cabinet post (keeping in mind that every Cabinet title starts with “Secretary of”), Sarah Palin brings no constituency with her, other than the 900,000 who prefer to live in darkness and twilight most of the year.

Other than Palin, all we have are a bunch of 1990’s retreads.

And Joe the Plumber.

OK, so let’s jump to the next generation. Eric Cantor, Republican congressman from Virginia has been making lots of noise lately. He is king of the one-liners, it seems. His comment that “‘I told you so’ politics won’t bring bipartisanship” has been oft quoted and repeated.

Eric Cantor.

Wait. Isn’t he Jewish?

Yep. Not only is he Jewish, but he is the only son of Abraham currently serving in Congress.

So, no. They will have to take a pass on Cantor. No Christ Killers in the Oval Office yet, at least not ones sent there by the Republican Christian Evangelical base. That would be too much for them to take.

And Bobby Jindal, the GOP’s own paean to ethnic diversity is a non-starter. Not after fumbling the ball in his near on air head-to-head joust with Barack Obama the evening of Obama’s address to the joint House and Senate last week.

Who does that leave? Who could possibly raise the Grand Obstructionist Party’s standard against “the Democrat menace?” Well, isn’t it already obvious? All you have to do is watch the news . . . and read the political cartoons. There is only one person capable of leading the Party of No to victory in 2012.

And that person, friends and neighbors, is Rush Limbaugh.

He is the perfect fit. And I’m not just talking about his 4XL shirt size. I’m talking about how he so neatly fits in with the Republican notion of truth. Of how careful Republicans are these days in forming opinions before checking their facts.

Take for example the case of Congresswoman Mary Bono Mack R-Palm Springs, former wife of Sonny Bono, who knew she had Barack Obama dead to rights when, in her attempt to oppose his stimulus package, decided to pounce on the president’s "pet project", the “Mag-Lev train from Disneyland to Las Vegas”, ordering her aide to “get him the bill, it's right there, show him.” Only to have her aide have to return to her and report “it’s not in the bill.”

Now that is what I call making sure of your facts before checking on them. Something that Rush Limbaugh has demonstrated time and time again. As a matter of fact, the facts that are most often repeated by the GOP office holders these days are the facts that they get from Rush Limbaugh or from Fox News. Limbaugh and Fox, the daring duo of truth in the right-thinking media. And who is Rush Limbaugh’s equal in Fox News? Why none other than Sean Hannity. That icon of the low hairline. He of the dragging knuckles.

So why not?

Why not propose the Republican Dream Ticket for 2012. Rush Limbaugh/Sean Hannity.

A ticket for the ages.

A one-way ticket to political oblivion.


Unknown said...

Rush is nothing but an overweight, pill popping buffoon!!

Unknown said...

Rush is an entertainer that preaches to the choir. He has a
cult like following that he could
probably get to drink the cool aid.
Another did with far less access
to the public.

Anonymous said...

why do you insult republicans. some were even dumb enough to vote for your president. but ok i would vote for rush if we still can vote in 4 years

J.D. said...

Good article. I truly believe that Limabaugh is arrogant enough to assume he would win...but sharp enough to know he is in a more powerful position right now. Better for him to snipe at whoever is in office then have to carry the burden of actually making decisions and dealing with the repercussions.

I also like how "anonymous" refers to your president as if he gave up his American citizenship when Barack Obama won the election.

Of course, there has been rampant hypocrisy from the right ever since Obama won. The same people who claimed that not supporting the President (when he was Bush) is the equivalent of being un-American, now love to claim the Obama isn't their President. Cute.

Anonymous said...

It doesn't matter which party is in power right now, both offer the exact same solutions just to a different bunch of cronies all borrowing from the same foreign banks leaving us with the bill and the hangover after their party ends. Thanks corporate America for dominating our two tax subsidized majors for so long and making greed the order of the day!

Anonymous said...

Isn't globalization (or world-wide monopoly) great!